Another fine Caturday

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This was possibly the first Saturday in ages where I’ve gotten up before noon. Came home early last night to set up my greenhouse and play League of Legends. I’m worried i’ve become boring; not been up for long haul drinking lately, and its nice to have something constructive to obsess over constructively.

Today began with a visit to Claremont Quarter to get stuff for some diet plan experiments. A mate at work lost 20kg in 8 weeks on the first part of the Atkins diet. He sent me some info and a recipe site; while I’m not a good candidate for cutting carbs, I’m very curious about the food substitutes and science around all this. Did you know you can make fake mash out of cauliflower and yummy crackers out of just cheese? How clever!

Will post links later. I owe you many links.

After shops, I played in the garden. We now have basil and coriander, along with some windowsill pots. I’d like to try flowers sometime soon too, after seeing a pretty setup on tumblr. Again, links later when I’m posting from a computer.

I’m still not over how gardening is fun now, after being really not fun for so long.

Up til recently, I’ve felt like any undertaking needs to be followed through – like if you get into something, you really need to get into it otherwise there’s no point. In hindsight, that’s pretty dumb, cos you don’t need to go all in to enjoy something. It’s okay to just have fun.

Also, there’s never really any pressure to be special or amazing at stuff, unless you’re a heart or brain surgeon. I used to fancy that I was born for some special purpose – to be a hero or rockstar or something. But after almost 30 years of being nowhere close, it’s pretty clear that’s not where I’m headed. What I do want, and lately have come to accept that I want this, is a simple life of having fun. Just fun.

Getting to this headspace is really freeing, because it removes the pressure to work towards a supposed destiny of being special or amazing or professional. I don’t have to cook the perfect dinner or write perfect webcopy or landscape the perfect garden. Things can just be what they are and instead of imaging how perfect they ‘should’ be, I can spend my energy on making the most of it.

Maybe that’s it then. Gardening is fun now cos there’s no need to stress over doing it awesomely. Having a good time is enough. :)

(For anyone in similar shoes, I’ll post links for this too. Really!)